Update on Life

New year, New outlook! There are so many things going on at the moment, it is hard to know where to start.

Ok…I’ll start with school. New semester is going well so far. Last semester was not my best. I passed with B’s, but I know that I can do better. However, the content was all about infants and toddlers and I just had a hard time dealing with the subject matter. I’m still dealing with the infertility issues and it was hard for me to concentrate on learning. I ended up very depressed and I started avoiding doing any work. I managed to pull it out in the end, thanks to my teacher accepting late work and being very understanding of where I was. This semester has already started off better, I’m getting my work done on time (if at the last second). So here is hoping I can be at my best

On the health front, I finally found out what the hell has been going on for the last year. I have developed insulin resistance due to PCOS. Apparently 75%-95% of women with PCOS develops insulin resistance. However, a lot of the symptoms can mimic depression so I was passed off for the last year because they thought it was just depression. I finally had a breakdown in the doctor’s office and they finally decided to run a whole gambit of tests. Apparently, this also causes infertility issues, so that might be the reason why I’m continuing to have the infertility stuff. I’m hoping that once I am on the correct dosage of meds that I will finally get through this whole nightmare.

I’ve recently had bad repressed memories pop up. I’m not going to get into any detail, but it was really hard to deal with for a few months. I’m so happy that my husband is as supportive as he is. Honestly, not many men would have been as patient as he has been nor would they have adjusted to new (but temporary) boundaries the way that he has. I really lucked out in the husband department! I think that’s why my brain opened that closed door. Because now I am in a place where learning these repressed things won’t break me or send me spiraling too far down into the depths of despair. It is good to deal with them now and learn new coping skills so that when these come up in the future it won’t be as much as a shock, and I can deal with them much faster.

My therapist has been awesome through all of this. She has really helped me a lot. Honestly, I have done more work and made more progress in the last year than I did the last 3 with my previous terrible therapist. This really goes to show that a bad therapist can do so much more harm than people realize. I am so happy that I finally was able to stand up and get rid of the old one. My anxiety has gotten much better ever since. And I don’t think she would have helped me through the rough patch I went though. I am grateful for this therapist.

Life is moving forward, and I am happy that I finally have a good update other than the usual slog.